Decision making following the news of a fetal abnormality while still pregnant
In few cases, the decision to terminate the pregnancy for abnormality
is very clear cut. The woman and her partner may have previously
discussed what they will do if there is a serious problem but
often the decision is looked at again. In many cases the mother
will have already bonded with her baby by the time the bad news
is given. Parents will not only have a scan picture but also a
mental picture of what their baby will be like as part of their
family.
Overwhelmed by disbelief, shock, anger, panic, anxiety
and confusion, parents may not know which way to turn. Being faced
with this situation is out of most people's experience. Parents
rarely know anyone else who has ever had to go through this dreadful
ordeal. The choices appear so bleak that finding a way forward
is excruciating. The national charity "Antenatal Results
and Choices" (www.arc-uk.org)
is currently the only provider of non-directive support outside
the hospital. You may also find it useful to contact Care
Confidential
For many people the choice of termination represents
an enormous weight of responsibility which they would rather not
carry. The decision seems a very lonely one and is based on many
different things:–
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The extent of the abnormality.
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The mother's age and fertility history.
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How much the baby was wanted.
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The degree of support around the family.
The way in which the news is given, the quality
of the information given and the time available for decision making
are also important factors which influence what happens next.
Parents give many different reasons for choosing
to end an affected pregnancy:-
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It's unfair to bring a baby into this world
who will suffer pain, disability and discrimination in society.
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It would be unbearable to carry the pregnancy
to 9 months knowing that the baby would not survive.
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Parents have many other commitments and do
not have the resources to give the kind of care and attention
that would be needed.
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Parental responsibility would pass to their
other children after parents die and this would be an unfair
burden on them.
For some, the decision is straightforward and there
is no dilemma but for many there is no clear cut choice that feels
absolutely right. The rational left side of the brain weighs up
all the evidence and may decide that termination is the best choice.
In contrast, the right side of the brain makes decisions on a
more emotional, intuitive level. During pregnancy women are much
more in tune with the right side of the brain and will experience
a deep and natural urge to protect the baby at all costs. This
internal "split" is rarely discussed with the medical
team and is often stifled or ignored. Parents must decide if they
will allow their baby to live. This moral dilemma sets up an internal
conflict which causes much psychological distress.
If you would like to email our bereavement counsellor
with any queries please do email midwifecounsellor@googlemail.com
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