Shopping trips can be a nightmare for parents especially when your child has a temper tantrum in the middle of the supermarket. I remember how inadequate I used to feel when this happened to me. It was also made much worse because other shoppers were watching and often seemed critical of the efforts I made to get my child to behave in a reasonable way.

It seems a no win situation for parents because the shopping has to be done, many parents have no family nearby to help and even if they can afford it, it is difficult to get baby sitters during the day and many shopping centres do not have a shopper’s crèche.

If your trips to the shopping centre are difficult for you, the following ideas might help:

• First of all it is worth remembering that shopping is not your child’s favourite pastime!
• Plan your shopping trip for the time of day your child isat their best i.e. not tired or hungry and when you feel energetic.
• If you have a network of friends with children similar in age to yours, it might be worth exploring the possibility of taking turns at baby sitting and shopping, especially for the weekly ‘big shop’.
• Separate the big shopping trips from the smaller ones by taking your child to the small local shops for short trips first.
• Make the trips quick so that they do not have time to misbehave and praise them for their good behaviour in the shop.
• Before the trip tell your child clearly what you want them to do, what you expect to happen not what you want them to stop doing.
• Gradually build up the time you are in the local shop with them, giving child-centered attention – ignoring minor naughtiness and giving lots of praise when your child does what you want.

Frances Byatt-Smith RN RHV BA Psychology

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