• For infants and young toddlers the predominant fear is fear of strangers
• At about eighteen months fear of animals, sudden noises, doctors and nurses come into prominence
• At around age two the fears include the toilet, the dark, people dressed up e.g. clowns and even Santa Clause
• About two and half years when the imagination is developing toddlers begin to worry about imaginary creatures

Remember that these fears are normal and part of a child’s normal development but understanding childhood fears and how to handle them is important for parents.

The reason for fears is because as children mature they are able to grasp the concept of cause and effect but with their limited experience they are unable to sort out all the possibilities for each situation. For example if the water flushes down the toilet isn’t it possible that I could be flushed away too, if the neighbours dog suddenly jumped up on daddy won’t all dogs jump up on people including me.

Toddlers are aware that they are small compared to those around them and this sense of size difference can be a cause of fear. Their growing imagination helps them to develop their social skills through play, enjoyment and fun but it can also be the source of fear. Babies usually forget frightening incidents e.g. injections but toddlers can retain that memory for a long time and many traditional stories like Little Red Riding Hood and The Three Bears can trigger fears.

Toddlers are also self cantered and all toys belong to them, all attention focuses on them and all experiences happen to them so if anything scary happens to anyone in a book or a TV programme it can happen to them. They also can become afraid of the things other toddlers display fear of.

The following tips may help:

• Acknowledge the fear as real and try to find the source (scary books, scary cartoons)
• When talking about fears with your child use stories to discuss the fear for example if your toddler has a fear of the toilet a story book about a child who uses the toilet without any mishap will help. Simple books that explain the fears are usually helpful
• Standing close to a toddler and watching the water flush down the toilet may help him/her to face the fear but you may have to do this several times before they are happy
• Using a gradual approach to overcoming fears often works for example holding them at a safe distance and watching, to standing closer and then allowing them to flush the toilet often works
• Never make fun of your child’s fears but helping a child to relax can in the end reduce fears
• Beware of overemphasising the fear because that could lead to the discovery that expressing fear is a reliable route to parental attention
• Make sure you are not responsible for the fear because sometimes fear in children is triggered by repeated parental warning and because of this it is important to be aware of your own fears and find ways of dealing with them

Frances Byatt-Smith RN RHV BA Psychology

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